Falling leaves.

The leaves shiver and shake,
Rattling together.
They flutter gracefully, soaring, catching an updraft,
Before gently grazing the cold, hard ground.
What strikes me the most, is how they leave their branches
To fall.
Just like I fall, fall,
Falling
For you.

your song on the radio.

It starts slow and than the bridge begins to build to the chorus, thoughts soaring in my head.
My neck begins to crease, my eyes begin to light up
And I gently turn up the volume of the stereo

I'm struck suddenly; the hairs on my neck stand on end and I feel weak
After all, sometimes it's the strongest memories from such a simple song that
Are caught beneath the landslide of life
You forget about these things and you let it go,
Slide, drain, empty from inside you
But still, there's a faint residue of remembrance of what used to be
Of phone calls at five in the morning
Sleeping in, sending texts you always wanted to save
Thinking of our demise makes me sick, and I think you should know,
No one has ever felt the way I felt about you

It hurts to think,
It's a little impossible to keep on this drive
And worse, I wish I never turned on the radio
Sometimes I wish it was just you and I, summer of 05

Some day you will find me
I know you will find me
After all, you knew me best
And you tried to hold on better than the rest

Writing the end

This wasn't the shit I signed up for when we went out
when I walk in, let's grab those cubes and throw them in a glass
don't stop, make it rock,
feel this, rush this pulse,
because there's no fear in the world that can separate us
especially when your mouth is around that bottle of Jack
don't stop, make it rock
tonight we're going to not fight, play these games
dig your three inch heels into the carpet
don't stop, make it rock
push me down, away, shit we can do this any day
don't need to fight, why make it right when we can drink all night?
No care in the world when you're here
we've got more class than the Queen on acid
crack, crack, crack, you hear that?
it's the sound of us breaking apart,
foundations cracking

pieces of our puzzle.

This has got to be over my head
everyone knows when you can't keep up to expectations
family pressures, alcohol induced seizures, failing exam marks
constant sickness, your vanity greater than mine, congratulations
girls that can't and won't put up with the disengaging of my heart
this can't be a change from the start.

It was the beginning of how things always were,
let's now reflect and allow our minds to wander
it's the teas on a warm evening.
its the hugs that make me feel that I matter.
its the dinner dates and drives, drive-thru's and dancing.
in the laughter in their eyes that can melt a coal heart.
movie nights while holding hands.
guitar strings ringing at 3 am.

You know what's the craziest feeling? No matter what happens I'm here for that someone.

I guess through metaphors, I am trying to tell someone I love them.
without the pieces, the puzzle is just...pieces.
and would you believe it? I feel complete.
life is too short to always be rushing us through.

(credit to Lisa-Marie Hasiuk for most of this)

Speaking from the other side of the heart

Every feeling that we get
When you're home alone, with your worst thoughts on your mind
When you can't miss anyone anymore
And when your thoughts can't seem to look up
After every hit we take
Every personal insult we laugh off and try to shake
The very people you smile at, but wish left your life
They hurt

This isn't supposed to be pretty or creative writing
It's simply powerful and expresses the bitterness we feel
You know that crazy feeling that just builds and builds
That gives you a rush of pure anxiety and is deep within you
The one where you want to lash out because of the hurt they caused you
I know that feeling, we all have that feeling
Why don't we let our thoughts for once, have meaning?
You hurt.

Forgetting how good I've got it

Actions speak louder than words. Destiny; you forgot about me.
Predictable? All my vanity has been lost.
I want to make you feel all right, hold you through the dark tonight.
Opinionated point of view, you live to push me away from you.
I want to make it feel all right.
The end of the world looks just like the beginning.

Stepping forward.

The sun beats down fiercely on my back.
My hands have already dried, leaving a gritty feeling of dried salt on my fingers.
Your hands are completely flat while you casually lie on your front, soaking up the deep rays.
My eyes start to droop, and my head begins to feel weighted down with rocks. I fall fast asleep, allowing the warm Mediterranean air to wash over me, peaking at a crescendo of a perfect sleep.

Cold water droplets on my back awakes me, freezing the very hair on my neck, passing frigid chills all the way down my body. I roll over quickly and attempt to bury my back in the sun blanket, all the while slowly opening my eyes. You're so gorgeous that I can't help but stare. My lips curl slowly into a wide smile and I squint, gently, as the fading light (already dusk? I wonder) reaches my peripheral vision. You look so happy, your long dark hair falls naturally from your shoulders and curls down beautifully over your neck, matching your tanned skin and that cute necklace I've always loved. We hold contact and you slowly position your lips on mine, held there in this expanse of meaningless time. I reach to touch you, to let you know you I'm awake, but you laugh at me, and forcefully grab my arm and attempt to pull me to my feet. Cute is what you aim for, and you're hitting it like you just can't miss.
"Time to swim, sleepy boy."

I glance at the water, foreboding, dark and churning, and I slightly shudder. I wish I could go back to my warmth. That's what happens when you fall asleep dreaming of her. Reaching back I grab your hand, tightly, and we wade into the water.
I let the waves lap at the bottom of my swim trunks, debating whether I can survive these temperatures. You are already up to your chest and you turn to face me, your face aglow in the pink sky.
"Come hereeee" you call.
I'm about to wade forward, but....
I gaze towards you, and realize this is the step I've been meaning to take for a while now. That step. The one where you're all I want.
I wade forward.
Perfect.