The car ride there was remarkably silent.
Her voice caught every time she went to speak. His eyes had glazed over, his mind over matter. Conversation never had a chance to begin. The road passed by with remarkable speed, the dark pine trees reaching into the sky, the dimming light fading, isolating. The world from outside looked menacing and cold, and she shivered slightly. He never took his eyes off the road, but he took off his blazer and handed it to her. His dress pants felt incredibly thin, every hair in his body stood upon end. Dark Canadian winter would do that to the body, chill, freeze, and mutilate, inch by inch, with bitter frostbite. She shivered and wrapped his blazer tight; her eyes were shut, and he just wished he could do the same.
He literally couldn't even focus enough to look at her - it was enough to watch the road, the drifting snow, and the shredded evergreens rushing past them as they drove in silence. They were only a few minutes from reaching the cabin, anyways. He couldn't wait until he could pour himself a drink, or six. His fingers were cold, incredibly so, and he placed his hand down towards the heater on the centre console. After fiddling with the climate control for a few seconds, he turned up the heat. Still nothing. His eyes betrayed a trace of annoyance, and he glanced at her beside him. She was looking away, her eyes closed, near the window pane. If breaking down was this hard, she was going to break him apart, piece by piece. He looked down towards the console again, still no heat was blowing out of the vents; quickly taking his eyes off the road - and that’s when it happened.
She screamed, it pierced the silence of the car. He suddenly looked up and saw a semi-trailer half in his lane, sliding precariously towards his SUV. He did the only thing he could do, avoid it. Ripping the wheel of his Range Rover to the right, he barely missed the rear end of the jackknifed, skidding semi, hurtling the SUV off the road and into a snowy patch of forest deep off the road below. He grabbed the wheel and shouted as the SUV began to gain speed and tumble down the side of what seemed like a ravine; later he would admit he lost count after four complete body rolls. Branches scratched and smashed out windows as they descended, until suddenly, they hit a tree, hard.
He awoke what felt like hours later to the sound of her whispering in his ear. He glanced around, taking in his surroundings. They landed luckily right side up on all four wheels. Most of the windows were destroyed and the B pillar of the rear doors had been destroyed from hitting the tree. He felt his bones and unclenched his fingers, so far so good; it was just his head, ringing and a nagging pain. He looked deeply at her, worried about what he'd find. Her lip was slightly bleeding, but she looked great - as always he thought. A little worse for the wear.
"Jordan. Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Her voice was quiet, but compassionate, deliberate. Always the same, always there. But not for him.
"I'm fine. Seriously."
She looked at him slightly suspiciously, and he looked down.
They sat in silence for a few seconds, and then he took matters into my own hands.
"Do you have cell reception? Let's see if we can start by calling out."
She reached into her pocket and took out her totally cracked iPhone.
"Can you even dial?"
She attempted too, but then shook her head; the screen was missing chunks of glass and revealed electrical components behind it. He fell back into his torn, leather seat.
He hadn't brought his cellphone along for this trip, because he had left it at the cabin when he visited earlier, preparing it for them, for her...
"Let's head out, make our way to the cabin," he told her.
His voice betrayed less of a statement and more of a question, but it slightly irritated her.
"It's almost dark, we won't be able to find our way in the dark, let alone find a cabin somewhere in the middle of the Canadian shield," she replied, rather tersely.
"I'm not against staying here, Ariana, but if you want to freeze, so be it. We don't have much choice."
She looked at him. Then her face lit up.
"Does your SUV battery still work in here? Turn on the car."
He was confused, but he did as asked.
He attempted to turn over the engine, nothing, but the electronics lit up.
She navigated her way to the onboard navigation and found directions to the cabin.
He took it all in, in amazement. This girl, she was smart, brilliant actually. Her intelligence had always been one of her most attractive aspects, it always made him feel proud that she was his... or had been.
He looked over at her in the fading light. Her long, dark hair cascaded over her shoulders, casual enough to look gorgeous in her white Doctor's coat, but sexy with just lingerie on. Off track he realized, feeling sick.
"Jordan! Did you hear me?" She was practically yelling at him.
He shook the cobwebs out and replied nicely, "Say that again, sorry. My head hurts."
She looked at him, slight compassion in her dark brown eyes. Nobody could make him feel that way like her, with just a look, withering or loving.
"The cabin is only a mile and a half away; if we stick close to the road and turn at this road here on Millcroft we should be able to make it by dark if we hustle."
He looked at her and asked, "You warm? We've got a walk ahead of us."
He gently gripped her hand, but she released it.
The snow crunched loudly underfoot as they began their walk heading towards the cabin, while yet staying incredibly close to the road above them. The dipping of the sun and the darkening sky painted a picturesque landscape above them, while making it harder for either of them to see. But with a few bruises and a slightly strained knee (he found that out later as they began to walk), walking became a slower affair than they thought. What was made worse was her flats were constantly full of snow - causing her to constantly dump out snow from them every few minutes. Her feet were freezing. While the walk became long and arduous, it fortunately gave both a chance to stick close together and to clear their heads.
She knew how hard it was on him for what she had done.
She was confused.
Cold, afraid of the inevitable. Of commitment. Unsure of their future.
Afraid of their life together.
They had too many issues, too many complications. They had loving families, close relations with each other's parents and siblings, but that's where it ended. She wasn't ready for that next step, she didn't think. Or was she? Why was she so reluctant to accept him, for all his faults?
She forced her feet to keep moving, following the tracing of the highway high above them. He saw her wince as she emptied her shoes, and he had had enough. He offered to carry her, just so she could take a short break from walking.
She refused, but she knew, that even in her tall five nine frame, she fit perfectly in his arms. The summer before, her brother was getting married and they danced together at his wedding until the sun had gone down and was on its way up, laughing and carrying on like they were two innocent kids in love. Her brother's marriage brought a blessing to her life; she truly saw the positives of him, the caring, unconditional acceptance and strong nature of him, and the playful, not-serious persona. Finishing up at med school, the dances at her brother's wedding had given her the opportunity to just relax, let down her guard, and to fully fall for him...
The sun had faded fast, leaving them in near pitch dark conditions. Jordan had brought the flashlight from the SUV and it pierced the darkness ahead of them in a wavering, unsteady motion. Patches of snow disguised logs tripping them up, and she looked down at what she assumed were legs scratched to the bone, and wished slightly she had accepted his offer to carry her. The sky began to slowly illuminate with stars as they neared down the road where the cabin was situated on. He checked his watch; it had only been just under an hour of walking. She looked worn out he thought, but she was stubborn. He was used to that.
"I've never felt so cold, and yet so Canadian at the same time," he said, laughing.
She couldn't help but smile, as she realized this inadvertent outdoor hike in the Canadian Shield, while being the last on her list of TO-DO in life, had brought her closer with Mother Nature. The creaking of branches and the howl of a distant coyote seemed almost cliché to her as they walked, but it gave her a small shiver.
Think positive thoughts she told herself.
They neared the small drive of the cabin and at last reached the door.
Even in the dark, the idyllic cabin was beautiful. Entirely wood constructed, and made years ago, vintage logs matched snow trails all across the roof, the veranda, and the small front porch. She sighed loudly.
He didn't say anything as they stepped inside. He didn't need too really.
She flicked on a light, as dim overhead bulbs lit up the interior of the kitchen and the living room. Tens of pure white candles and hundreds of dark red rose pedals lay all over the floor in a perfect path to the master bedroom. The air smelled musty, but something smelled better than that, sweet adoration.
He looked away and headed to the kitchen.
She took off her shoes and looked around in amazement. Even from the wooden rafters in the ceiling, a new chandelier had been put in - sparkling white, something she had always wanted in her future house she had told him. He had laughed when she told him, but later that week he ordered one, the type she wanted, from Germany, and had it installed in preparation for her.
She slowly began to walk into the family room, where he had begun already to build a fire.
She saw a bottle of premium champagne already opened, on the hard, wooden table.
She took long swallow and sat in front of the fire.
He sat down at the table after a few minutes of stoking the fire and continued to drink.
They looked away and then made eye contact.
"I'm sorry," he said first. "I didn't know it would be like this." He looked wistfully at her, almost sadly, she thought.
"It's okay," she whispered.
He got up, suddenly and leaned over the kitchen sink, looking out through snowy windows. She saw the hurt in him, the pain. He stood there for several minutes, before she came up from behind and began to embrace him. He felt her hands wrap around his chest and her gorgeous hair fall over the back of his neck.
She let herself go, she let herself go.
All of these issues, these insecurities he had, he was worth it. The games with other girls, the parts of him that she wanted to change, she let it go. He was hers, and she was his.
She wasn't perfect herself, was she? She didn't have everything in her life all figured out, did she? He put up with all of her issues, didn't he? Why was she afraid to commit?
The fire crackled in the background and the wind lightly howled against the log walls. The creaking of the cabin was the only sound in the room, other than the beating of her heart.
She kissed the back of his neck gently.
He turned around and looked into her eyes, then kissed her deep, hard, now.
She reached up and started to unbutton his dress shirt, pulling it off furiously. He grabbed her waist and pulled up her dress, his aggressive nature taking over.
They knew they worked together. It wasn't about being trapped in a cabin, or surviving a car crash.
This was about them. All the rushing thoughts of her walking away when he proposed, the consternation and confusion when she broke his heart, left him, for this very instance.
They weren't perfect, and never would be. But they needed that one chance to realize how perfect they were together.
Suddenly, loud knocks came at the door.
Part II will come down sometime soon!
