I don't mind feeling this way when you look at me that way

I think the title says it best
it's tough when you're closer to my heart, but I can't help but wish we were further apart.
I don't know what is tougher;
missing my life in Europe,
or the times where I wasn't with you
yeah I know I sound all bitter and tough
but I'm not joking when I said I've had enough
I don't know how to tell you though that my heart
has moved on from making things right
to not caring if you're the last one I see before
I put out the light

Remember that time, CN Tower, rainbow shining
I stood on top of the building and looked down at the
city below us, fading into black, beginning to blink
I didn't know then but I know now
I'm not ready to fight for you
I can't be there for you
And no, for all the things that I need,
Really, you can't take back the things you said,
The way you felt, the glow of the sun overhead,
Which is now dipping over a crest
I'm dying with you, goodbye light

Goodbye moon, goodbye heart, goodbye you

Nothing can save us from the fallout

A heart that's full up like a landfill,
a job that slowly kills you,
bruises that won't heal

For a clean break, nothing can save me
From your lack of touch to the weight of your words
I learned this the hard way, and I realized that when things are going great, the harder you will get hurt
It's 2AM and I lost a friend, now save me, I'm calling for you
You've got out of my head, and I don't know who to turn too
I want you to know, I've got this strange condition
Of what I want you to know,
Of what you've done to me
Of what I've finally let go

It's not that I felt weak when things were piling up and up and out control
I tell myself this hurt will disappear the longer you're away from here, while I'm stuck in this hole
Can't you see that I am weak when I am lost without you?
Can't you see that I am scared?
Hear me, I'm sure I've changed for you, too late I know

We step one through three, back to the bar, free shots all night until the light shines on the walls
The same walls where I put your back into the plaster, where our laughs kept up the neighbors,
Where we made that night last forever
The slow dances, the wedding toasts to best friends starting on a new life together
I remember promising myself we'd be on that podium one day later,
I promised, I promised
I know my eyes can't shut like they used too, I even washed my sheets because they felt like you

There is no second chances, and I know I've learned a lesson
Don't be afraid to take second chances, why end something so good for the sake of pride so shallow?
And we begin all over again, finding that someone, but right now I can't think of another pretty girl when it's your ghost hovering in my brain, your heart grasping mine, mine, mine
Now we're lying alone on our back, the ceiling screaming down upon us
I'm breathing in ragged short stops, while you're crying in that pretty white dress
That dress once white is now black, like the darkness of your hair, your heart

I think it honestly all boils down to insecurity
Because if you feel insecure about yourself, how are you supposed to deal with
Insecurities and the fears of others?
You can't, because it's like teaching geography when you think the earth is flat
In the same way, when you don't call or try to reach me
I can't deal with you and your games, as lame as that may be
We're supposed to be dating and you're out with what's his name
It's an hour past that I've been waiting for you, now whose to blame?
You would make this so easy, because it's all so logical,
Unfortunately the heart never chooses where it wants to follow
Well I love you so much but do me a favor, baby, don't reply

Worst date ever!

So I've had my fair share of dates, okay quite a few, but I just had the worst one ever this past week. To be honest, usually I don't go on dates, I make a girl work hard to even see me one on one, but last week I allowed myself to be charmed by this girl I met at a hockey store here in TO. She's quite the little beauty, seemed to be pretty funny, and goes to a University close to me. Oh and she's 5'8, my perfect height... I mine as well go for a date right, even though I don't know her.
I pick her up in my super low car, open the door, she falls right in. Conversation starts to go good, I make her laugh when I show her my music collection, the feeling is right.
We go to a sweet place I like to eat at in the GTA, near the Lake, where I was going to take her afterwards. Dynamite right? So about three minutes in, conversation takes a huge lull. I try to recover it as eloquently as I can.. but nothing works. She would barely speak and she has absolutely nothing interesting to say! I ask her about her family, and she clams up; I ask her about her courses she's taking; she answers in monosyllables and lightly talks about the boys she knows at school. I tease her but she started being cocky everytime I teased her; and worse, she stopped paying attention when I was talking. And to complete this nightmare train, she was a terrible kisser! It was like torture!
Midway through I actually downloaded and used an Iphone app that lets you call yourself. I ended a date that started at 6PM at 8PM and then went out with another girl I'm already seeing... damn.
It really reminded me that dating is a skill in and of itself and just because a girl's been on a lot of dates doesn't mean that she's going to be interesting or good on them. Even worse, is when guys who are lame enough to take girls like this out(she models at car and event shows), they let them act badly and continue to throw heaps of attention on them. I called her on it repeatedly and then faked a phone call to get away. Overall it's just amazing that a girl with this personality ever gets a second date. Never underestimate the power of male sexual desperation...ever.
Enclosed a picture of the prey we will call FAIL (the blonde on the left).

You're so Vain.

When you tell me the greatest part of us, is seeing old pictures, I know I can hold through this weather.
The countertops of our life are cracking. The paint is peeling. The walls of my life are closing - deep breath. The stovetop is slow to heat. Just like us when we touched and smiled at first sight.
I think the greatest part of criss cross patterns on the floor, is the knowledge that our vinyl is still slippery. We can't stare and see the sky anymore, the precipitation of our desires holds these rainclouds above us.
I don't want to write anymore, when I can see your thoughts fall off the end of my pen. Its like a failure of us, I can't stand to see occur.
You're so vain.

-Tyler Stunna-